Mary had always wanted to go to school like her friends in the neighborhood, but she did not have a childhood. In 1998, when she was 10 years old, she was forced to live with her husband as his second wife. Her husband, Chukhu Kaya, whose youngest son was Mary’s age, had five children from his first wife. Mary’s father, Nabam Saha, had received eight Mithuns from Chukhu Kaya as Mary’s bride price, when she was still too young to remember. Her father had expired some 12 years back.
Mary learned to live with the Chukhu family, initially helping with the household chores. As she grew up, she spent most of the time working in the fields and jungles. She dreaded growing up, because her husband started making advances towards her. Mary, somehow, managed to stay away from him.
Since 2006, Mary had been approaching her mother and brothers requesting them not to let her stay with the Chukhu family. “I want to go to school”, she would say. She even implored her husband to let her go to school but he dismisses her, saying, “I paid your price to your father. You are my wife now and I will keep you as I wish.” Her brothers were helpless since this has been the tradition. The only way out was to pay back the mithuns to Chukhu family, but her brothers had no capacity to do that. Mary was contemplating suicide.
In 2009, Mary joined the Women Action Group (WAG) formed by Future Generations Arunachal (FGA) and came into contact with Punyo Rina who is working as the Project Supervisor. Mary shared her agony with her and got much needed encouragement for the first time from anybody. In one of the workshops, some women from Palin, who too were victims of child marriage, had shared their story. The story of their successful struggle encouraged Mary not to lose hope. She started participating in every meeting and training, but her husband did not like this. He started harassing Mary more than ever and started talking ill of other members of the women’s groups as well as of the FGA staff. Paradoxically, these defensive behaviors of her husband emboldened Mary to fight on with more determination. She made sure not to miss any program and managed to leave the house even clandestinely. During an exposure trip to Ziro, she shared her story and got sympathy and encouragement from everybody.
As Mary’s protests grew stronger, a compromise was made: Kaya will let go of Mary, but she had to accept Peter, his youngest son, as her husband. In return, Mary’s brothers agreed to bear the expenses for Peter’s education. As a token, they gave a cow, some chicken and traditional beads to Kaya. Chukhu Kaya, however, did not keep the agreement. He started making advances towards Mary again.
In the night of July 22, 2010 Mary had a fight with her husband when he forcefully tried to sleep with her. “I will complain against you to the women’s group and Miss Rina if you try to force anything,” Mary told him. This angered him and he snatched away her mobile phone. Mary somehow managed to escape from the house and spent the night in the house of Kaya’s eldest daughter, who was married and stayed nearby. Next morning, when she came back to her husband’s house, they had an argument again. Mary then went to Yazali to discuss about the issue with Joseph, Kaya’s eldest son. Joshep lives with his family at Yazali. Joseph could not give any concrete suggestion. “Do whatever you think is right,” was all he said. Mary then went to Yachuli to meet the local women’s leader. She allowed Mary to stay with her for sometime so that she could observe her true intention. Mary stayed at Yachuli for a month and convinced everbody that she was determined to fight against the system. It was then that they lodged a formal complaint in the court of the Additional Deputy Commissioner.
The first hearing of the case was on September 29, 2010. In the second hearing on October 16, 2010 the final verdict was given by the court. It was decided that Mary will be allowed to go to school. It was also decided that Mary will accept Peter, the youngest son of Kaya, as her husband. However, if Peter happens to marry any other girl, Mary will be free to choose her course of life. At the same time, if Mary happens to develop a relationship with any other man, her brothers will have to return the 8 eight mithuns, which was initially paid as the bride price.
Mary has got herself admitted to third standard in the village school. She attends her classes regularly, sitting with 9-year old children. She has won the first battle against the system that has oppressed women of her tribe for generations. The struggle continues.
